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Schofield and Binns go camping - not together

The daring duo head to separate fields in Yorkshire to test out some kit

Written by . Published on August 11th 2011.


Schofield and Binns go camping - not together

SUMMER'S here, the kids are off and it's probably going to rain anyway, but camping is one of the great British pursuits, along with afternoon tea, standing in queues and rioting.

We packed our editor and Binns off to Yorkshire to breathe in some fresh air and indulge in some local recreation.

"When I woke up in the great outdoors, I felt refreshed and ready for anything, and decided to go foraging like Bear Grylls. I got as far as the café in the big Tesco a ten minute drive away."

Schofield’s camping fun:

WE WENT to a pleasant site called Holme Valley, just north in Holmfirth. It had a duck pond and was surrounded by a number of towns with the word ‘thong’ in the title. One is twinned with a place in France. Cue terrible jokes about a Thong for Europe and the Eurovision Thong Contest.

New blanketNew blanketThere was a pub nearby, so I was happy. We were tasked with testing out Bar-Be-Quick portable barbecues.

Bar-be-quick barbecues cook bacon very, very quickly. And mushrooms, sausages, tomatoes, burgers, eggs. Even quorn (should you ever be mad enough to do so). This was evident while camping for a couple of nights in August in the tropics of West Yorkshire.

We used the bar-be-quick furnaces over breakfasts for fifteen people. Normally these breakfasts take around four hours to complete with several chill down moments where fresh instant barbecues have to be produced. On these barbies, breakfast took a third of the time and the things never looked like cooling off. These boys motor.

They also came in a large amount of bubblewrap, which the biys used as a large blanket. Thanks to Peppermint PR for their wrapping skills.

It's fast camping, allowing people to get down to their morning hike straight-away. Or even a visit to a nearby roller disco as we did. 

 

Binns’ camping fun:

Bed for the nightBed for the nightI WENT to a site called Poplar Farm just outside York, on the banks of the River Ouze. It had statics on one side of the road, and tent pitches on the other. Me and my two mates were under canvas. The site owner was a bit perturbed when three lads turned up in a car full of booze and asked when the girls were joining us.

Nope, just us.

He didn’t know whether to ask if we were gay or wanted to smash the place up, so he tried an awkward stab at both. Funny.

We explained we were in our thirties and had kids, and had come away for peace and quiet.

Img_0973There was also a pub next to the site, called the Ship Inn, which did brilliant pub grub and stayed open late. It had everything you’d expect from a provincial pub, including a bad pub singer. “Does anyone remember the 80s?” Yes, we do. It was only 20 years ago and most of the people in here are 50.

Top pork butties though.

I was testing out a sleeping bag – the Hi Gear Ridgeline 2 – kindly donated by Go Outdoors at Urban Exchange in Manchester.

It was snug and warm but really light and I could actually pack it back into the bag afterwards, something I’m normally rubbish at.

Enjoying pork buttiesEnjoying pork buttiesI also had a single inflatable bed from Tesco, but I got so drunk at the Ship Inn I couldn’t be arsed to blow it up. The sleeping bag had enough padding to stop me waking up with a bad back though.

When I woke up in the great outdoors, I felt refreshed and ready for anything, and decided to go foraging like Bear Grylls.

I got as far as the café in the big Tesco a ten minute drive away, where I had a Slush Puppy.

Well, I am a city dweller. What did you expect?

Thanks to Bar-be-Quick for the eats and Go Outdoors at Urban Exchange for the sleeps.

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