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Sleuth 08/06/2012

Timekeeping With TOWIE, Andrew Nutter Breaks Record, Chic Parties And Dinosaurs

Published on June 8th 2012.


Sleuth 08/06/2012

SleuthSleuthSleuth is a sideways glance at the city every week, it's the truth, but Sleuth's truth. He's several people all at once. We give £25 for every story/rumour and piece of absurdity you find for us to publish. Sleuth sometimes even gets serious. We ask for the money back if any legal action follows. Follow Sleuth on twitter @Sleuth

Chef breaks height singing record

The picture at the top of the page shows Andrew Nutter perched 140ft above Manchester city centre. He’s in full Jubilee mode and singing God Save The Queen while waving a Union Jack flag. It was an impressive sight. Sleuth was stood with the chef on the mightiest cherry picker he’s ever seen from that nice man Neil at High Access plant hire. Sleuth wondered during Nutter’s singing whether this was the highest at which the National Anthem had ever been sung in Manchester. 

Nadine Merabi's Olympics - perfectly British

Andrew Nutter was a guest at Nadine Merabi’s thirtieth birthday party or the Merabi Olympics, as her partner the effervescent Morgan called it. Nadine is a fashion designer, click here, and works and lives in the Barton Arcade on Deansgate which has a perfect roof garden for jollities such as this. It was a damn fine occasion complete with drink, food, games, good company, driving rain and a howling gale. The perfect British summer event. Nadine had made her appearance over the parapet of the Barton in the cherry picker (she's in the silver dress) mentioned in the story above with friends such as Dianne Bourne, the Diary Editor of the MEN (second to the right from Nadine) and Corrie actress Catherine Tyldesley (squatting in the black dress on the left).

Photos by Carl Sukonik at www.thevain.co.uk

Nadine Merabi 4Nadine Merabi Party

Diary Editor of MEN gets new name

After flying through the air at the party above, Sleuth has re-named Dianne Bourne as Dianne AirBourne. This has now been officially adopted by the city at large and by the MEN and must be used when addressing her. 

Nadine Merabi 3Nadine Merabi Party

Sleuth interviews dinosaur about new university research

Sleuth was intrigued by the Manchester University research that revealed dinosaurs were much lighter than previously thought (click here). He called Shaun Ryder up about this and the singer from the reformed Happy Mondays confirmed that, “Yes, obviously we were younger so we were lighter back then.” Other animals we’d thought extinct such as the Stone Roses, New Order, the Inspiral Carpets and Peter Hook, all confirmed that they had been much lighter way back in the Baggyassic Age.

Madchester bands rehearsingThose re-formed Madchester bands rehearsing

Sleuth's Direct Response Of The Week

This comes from a recent public consultation between residents and and Manchester city council about the Granada site presently up for sale in the city centre. The planning officer from the council was asked whether he could speak up. "No," he said.

Sleuth and the Library Walk controversy

This issue has been the centre of a storm in the past week - click here. Most Mancunians don't want one of the most charming city thoroughfares ruined by gates and a glass feature to provide access from Central Library to the Town Hall Extension. Sleuth has been thinking about this and has struck upon a remarkable solution. Why not just put doors in each building without installing the glass link and not gate Library Walk. Of course people may feel the cold in the six step hop between the two buildings but probably wont die of pneumonia or frostbite.

Libraryprop3Library Walk

Timekeeping with TOWIE star

Fresh from filming in ‘Marbs’ (that's Marbella for those who don’t speak Essex), Sam Faiers, star of the BAFTA award winning TOWIE, was due to make an appearance at Selfridges in the Trafford Centre this week to sign copies of her number one bestselling book, ‘Living Life The Essex Way’.

Sam Faiers Hoards of fans crowded the womenswear section of the store, much to the dismay of security, keen to get a glimpse of the Essex girl who had earlier Tweeted ‘Looking forward to meeting everyone at Selfridges Trafford Centre tonight for my book signing. I will be there at 6pm! X’.

Problem was, she wasn’t there at 6pm. Or quarter past. Or half past. ‘SHAAT APP!’ I hear you cry. Faiers was very fashionably late “due to traffic” Sleuth was initially told.

Tired of waiting and having missed his interview slot, Sleuth delved a little deeper, asking an insider if she was travelling from Marbs or something. “No,” replied fed-up insider. “She’s been in Manchester city centre all day. She was getting her hair done and lost track of time.”

“Ahhh, looks before books” thought Sleuth. Typical TOWIE.

Fans wait for TOWIE star Sam Faiers at Selfridges in the Trafford CentreFans wait for TOWIE star Sam Faiers at Selfridges in the Trafford Centre

Sleuth’s Lies To Tell Tourists

You make a joke and it comes true in the end. Sleuth normally has some fine fabrications for this section of his lovely column. But this time there’s no need. In an article in RED magazine, the in-flight magazine for TAM Airlines in Brazil, someone in our fair city told a journalist a proper porky. The article says: ‘You can stay in Beetham Tower, the tallest building in Manchester - a mix of apartments and a hotel (Wayne Rooney, striker for Manchester United has a whole floor to himself, as does Peter Hook).’ As does Sleuth. No, honest. Two floors actually, and a massive helter skelter to get down.

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5 comments so far, continue the conversation, write a comment.

AnonymousJune 8th 2012.

Library Walk is my single, most favourite part of Manchester. I am outraged.

SpencerSpurchJune 8th 2012.

Libary Walks is super rare.

Catering JamesJune 9th 2012.

Loved the dinosaur thing....rock n roll not

TerryJune 9th 2012.

TOWIE - you should never have gone along in the first place although it was interesting that she was signing in the Trafford Centre, very apt

Opera fanJune 9th 2012.

That wasn't the highest the national anthem has been sung I once knew a castrato that....I'll get my coat

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