MCR's Best Cakes, LVG Has Wings, Peake's Hamlet, Jesus Is Priceless

                               SleuthSleuth is a sideways glance at the city every week, it's the truth, but Sleuth's truth. He's several people all at once. We give £25 for every story/rumour and piece of absurdity you find for us to publish. Sleuth sometimes even gets serious. We ask for the money back if any legal action follows. Follow Sleuth on twitter @mcrsleuth 

The Best Mille Feuille In The North West... Maybe The Best Cakes Too.

Sleuth was in Didsbury and went to Bisous Bisous, the new patisserie on Wilmslow Road. It's the dreamchild of Alex Moreau of 63 Degrees on Church Street in the Northern Quarter. He was with a lady and she swooned for the cakes. When Sleuth had tried and failed fifteen or sixteen times to pronounce mille feuille he finally clamped his jaws on the Frenchie vanilla slice and joined her in swoonland. The patisserie makes eveything on site including bread, brioche, macaroons and swoons. Sleuth took some cakes home and with his mouth brimming over found a video clip dedicated to the correct pronunciation of the hardest French word ever.

Bisous Bisous

Jon Wilkin: Gentleman Of Coffee

Jon Wilkin

Pot Kettle Black

"Would You Like Opium With That, Sir?"

Sleuth came across a story this week that gave him an idea. A Chinese restaurant owner in China's northern Shaanxi province had been lacing his food with opium so that customers would become addicted to the stuff and return. Sleuth thinks Mr Zhang is on to something. Research indicates that by 2050, half of the UK population will be obese. The strain on the NHS will be monumental, with some estimates suggested fatties may actually bankrupt the NHS. No bother, Sleuth's solved the problem with the help of Mr Zhang. Lace salads with opium, douse fatty processed junk in rat's piss. Sorted. Next...

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Peake Of Her Powers

Maxine Peake as Hamlet

Cheese Hamlet - Shakespeare Worked Here

LVG Finds Wings

BBC Ghost Of Independence

Following the Scottish Independence NO result last week, Sleuth's colleague was watching a BBC News broadcast live from outside St Gile's Cathedral in Edinburgh. Imagine the colleague's surprise when the white Ghost of Independence casually strolled through the background of the shot, suitcase and map in hand. Off on holiday to Catalan, perhaps?

Sleuth Needs Help

Mmmm

Priceless Jesus

Sleuth went for a nose around Manchester's annual affordable(ish) art event, the Buy Art Fair, at Old Granada Studios this week. Enjoying it he was too, washed along the aisles of exhibitors on a wave of free plonk, nodding and hmm'ing accordingly. Sleuth spotted a couple of pieces that took his eye: Superman snogging Batman and a nun's face made entirely of arses. Sleuth unknowingly found himself in the contemporary part of the event, where the folk nod and hmm harder than the others, and came across Jesus splayed across a pool table (below). "How much?" asked Sleuth. "It's priceless," replied someone (possibly the artist, possibly not). Pause. "Really?" said Sleuth. "Because you can pick one up from Argos for under £200, there's no Jesus included but it comes with balls and a free Ronnie O'Sullivan branded cue." Pause. "Hmm," nodded the artist/possibly not artist.

'You can pick up a new one without Jesus for £200...'