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George W Bush to work for Confidential

America’s most competent President to write for us

Published on November 5th 2008.


George W Bush to work for Confidential

George W Bush is to become Confidential’s US correspondent.

After the inauguration of Barack Obama, the current President of the USA has agreed to keep our readers up-to-date with activity across the pond.

We invited him to join our pool of writers after an emotional 5am meeting in the Circle Club one recent morning.

This was when we realised we had nobody on the magazine who could write authoritively on ranching, guns, born again Christianity and invading other nations.

Given Dubya’s well known skill with words and talent in these areas we sent him an email. This was his reply.

‘Howdy, i will bee only two delited to work for Cunfidonshal. In my roll as the President of the gratest country on God’s green planet I loved nuttin better than to pack up a few guns and take extended trips abroad.

‘Now ahm lookin forward to downtime after January when I hand over power to my good friend Senor Obama. And let me say how very pleesed I was to see him win both the American elections and the Formula One World Championship in the last few days.'

‘But this means I'll now be able to rite for your fine magazine in your grate city of whatever the name is in your wonderful nation of Denmark.’

George W Bush’s proposed first article in February 2009 is: ‘ Weapons of Mass Indigestion: the case for attacking Rusholme’

Other news:

Barack Obama burns McCains chips

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13 comments so far, continue the conversation, write a comment.

JBNovember 5th 2008.

Emma Grace, does your boss know you live on ManCon, why dont you try get your own version of sleuth on here?

MurdochNovember 5th 2008.

Mr T your the liar!!!!Heatseeker is speaking the truth.You never used to pull your weight when we were on the A team,all you did was threaten people.Just cause Sly Stallone didnt ask you to do another film.Deal with it.I collect trolleys at Asda and you dont here me complaining.P.S i NEVER LIKED YOU BECAUSE YOU HAVE B.O MAN.

rosieNovember 5th 2008.

I don't

MR TNovember 5th 2008.

heatseeker your a liar and a fool.i worked hard on the A team and now i earn a crust promoting snickers bars!ever had a snickers? they taste like squirrell s**t!

a new eraNovember 5th 2008.

Ha luv it !First we see Arnie in California,perhaps now that Obama has taken hold, anything can happen!!!Ricky Gervais? place your bets please!!!

heatseekerNovember 5th 2008.

what all fuss about barack obama getting into the whitehouse? for years blackmen have been breaking into white houses. whats the difference between marmalade and jam?you cant marmalade your c**k up your girlfriends a**e!!!!!!!!!

emma graceNovember 5th 2008.

Good idea JB...I think ManCon should let me have my own column once a week :)

Dayhulme girlNovember 5th 2008.

That made me giggle.Cheers Conficential!

heatseekerNovember 5th 2008.

well thats mighty kind of you to say so idiots on the web.yo bingo baggins lighten up my man!i am black and i thought it was funny.where the hell do think mr t got all his bling from argos?

Idiots on the webNovember 5th 2008.

Heatseeker, you witty bugger.

emma graceNovember 5th 2008.

No, I doubt many would!

grinningNovember 5th 2008.

funny

Bingo BagginsNovember 5th 2008.

I bet that was really funny when it was in your head wasn't it heatseeker? Shame that all of the comedy was sucked right out of it as you typed, leaving nothing but a shallow representation of a vacuous moron.

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