Rail Ale Trail - Sobriety Fail

'THE RAIL Ale Trail up the East Lancs Railway is one of the best ways to learn of the history of Bury and Ramsbottom, and enjoy the views of the passing West Pennines from lovingly restored trains.'

Yep, of course.

Just as importantly it's also one of the jolliest ways of getting inebriated – as I found out with 18 Manchester Confidential Heroes one recent Friday.

Life was good. We were ale and hearty. Issues were simple.

There’s beer everywhere in these hills.

This was the timetable.

At 11.30am we met our witty, amusing, knowledgeable and brilliantly trained Green Badge Guide Suzanne Hindle at the Trackside pub at Bolton Street Station in Bury. We drank beer. Then she took us on a brief tour of Bury where we didn’t drink beer, before we got on a train where we did drink beer until we reached Ramsbottom.

At that point we had another brief walk (guided tour incorporated) to the marvellous Irwell Works Brewery where we drank beer. After that it was up to the Chocolate Cafe where we sampled  choccy beer before moving on to the Major pub where we drank beer – and were given chip butties.

On the way back to the station and the 4.20pm train, Suzanne had a fabulous and innovative idea. She suggested we find another pub and drink some beer. We did.

The Confidential group made time fly with good conversation, ready smiles and after about 3pm, total gibberish. The group was of all ages, backgrounds and proclivities, including one gent who showed real promise with a video camera.

Still, this was an ale trail so I couldn’t help slipping into cliché.

“So what are you here for, young woman?” I asked twenty-something Katrina Urwin of Manchester Fashion Network. “Are you sure this is your sort of thing? I see no beard, I see no pot belly, nor any humorous t-shirt advertising 'Old Goat's IPA' or some such. ”

“There are vintage trains and real ale, what’s not to like?” Katrina replied so sensibly tears sprang to my eyes. "Those two are like meat and drink to me."

Meanwhile Victoria Galvis won the award for oddest story of the day.

Vicky is from Cali in Columbia (via a husband in Hyde) and had brought along her mother-in-law.  She told a strange tale of a festival in her home town where ladies who’ve had breast enhancements ride horses through the city streets with white shirts on while being sprayed by men with water pistols. No idea how this conversation cropped up or why she told it but it was an entertaining if unnerving story. I'm just hoping I didn't dream the thing.

In Ramsbottom we met Chris Johnson in the street, proprietor of one of Confidential’s favourite restaurants Ramsons, who broke some good news - click here. Sweet man. 

With the tour formally finished on our return to Bury station many of the party decided they were so enjoying the day they'd continue in the Trackside pub.

And then in the Met bar. 

At some point in the evening there may have been some food eaten.

Life was good. 

We were ale and hearty. 

Issues were simple.

There are a couple of ways to enjoy this excursion. You can pick up a Rail Ale Trail leaflet and self guide yourself.

Or you can take a guided rail ale tour on various routes such as the one Confidential Heroes enjoyed.

Routes include: 2 September Two Brewery Tour (Irwell Works and Phoenix); 24th September Ramsbottom; 25 SeptemberSummers; 29 October Pale Ale Halloween.

For more information and prices contact 0161 764 7790. our guide Suzanne Hindle can be reached on suzannehindle@hotmail.co.uk

Platform 9.75 Hogwarts-Ramsbottom Express

Abbey Rail re-enacted

Summerseat station with view of hills

Guide Suzanne Hindle does her impersonation of a steam train

Bury's Bolton Street Station

Trackside pub

Anorakside pub

Guide puts best foot forward

Bury has a cultural quarter?

Bury Castle attacked very slowly by Heroes

Victoria tells odd story of Columbian women in white shirts 

Micro-brewery texting in Ramsbottom's Irwell Works Brewery

Ancient spirit of Ramsbottom welcomes group

The house of the Ancient Spirit of Ramsbottom

Chocolate beer at the Chocolate Cafe in Ramsbottom

27 pints later and going back on the train

Time for a quick last ten pints everyone thinks and dashes into the Trackside pub again

Manchester Confidential Hero goes mad and climbs the wall

Hero turns into dog through too much drink and enjoys a tickle

Picture of food found on camera proving that some sustenance was taken in the evening