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WHAT’S in a name? You may well ask. For most of us, it should be a good indication of what the thing is that the name represents. Therefore, if someone says , “Look, There’s Pete” we can reasonably assume that we are looking for a male, probably white and lower middle class, living in a suburb of a city. Pete is more than likely over the age of thirteen and can play football. If he was a baby, he’d be known as Peter, which would nail down the demographics a bit.
Up the stairs and you come across a restaurant that is designed to make your spine vibrate. Open brickwork, murals that can compete with the best cinematography that Breaking Bad treated us to and a genuine feeling of sunshine and heat on a cold rainy day.
With Pete a wild guess would put forward the idea that he wouldn’t be gay; as if he were he may well be known as Petey. And before you all accuse Gordo of being homophobic please remember that this is demographics and nothing else. Besides, some of Gordo’s best friends are gay – no, honestly. As were two of his aunts and an uncle, so go and get stuffed.
Anyway, most people when naming someone, something or somewhere do it in a fashion to help the rest of us out. Therefore, we know that a house is a house. A tree is a bloody great big plant, and that Gordo is more than likely a big fat bastard. All of which are true.
So, what on earth is Luck, Lust Liquor and Burn?
Believe Gordo, you would never get it in a million years. But let him give a few clues. Firstly it’s something in Manchester’s Northern Quarter. Secondly, it has people in it that can be in Lust - something Gordo spends most of his life in, the vast majority of which is unrequited. Thirdly, liquor kinda gives away that there is drink involved, mainly cocktails. Finally, Burn? Hmm. Can this be something that burns, a fire maybe? Nope, think chilli heat and we start to get there.
Finally, it’s a relative of other daftly named places in the area such as Almost Famous Burgers and Home Sweet Home, Solita, North Tea Power, Tusk, Blue Pig – how long have we got? This place is a Californican restaurant. Full of the type of food you get in San Diego, and south past the border towards Los Mochis in Mexico. It’s gonna be hot stuff.
Obvious eh? Well Gordo was completely baffled until The Editor came back from an early peek and explained the concept; in other words dirty food.
Hot, in your face, angry, seductive and powerful food.
Now for those of you who know the stable behind Socio Rehab and Almost Famous Burgers, you will know that apart from having a mentalist involved in the running of them, that is Beau, you can start to run Gordo’s demographic ruler across the proposition and assume that whatever the food is, it’s going to be good. And filthy in the right way.
Gordo decided to help you all out and go the day after the official opening, goaded on by a pal. One of the few bloggers who knows what he is talking about and isn’t just a journo becoming an expert on food all of a sudden. Free dinner anyone?
Hungry Hoss is his name and boy, Hoss knows what he is on about. He was going so Gordo hauled his arse out of bed and walked over from The Fat Cave to see what the fuss was all about.
This restaurant is in the place where Socio Rehab used to be; it has taken over the ground floor and spread out upstairs, on the first floor of the building. Downstairs is a bar, where the cocktails are, presumably, on form; you can get a cut down food menu.
Up the stairs, and you come across a restaurant that is designed to make your spine vibrate. Open brickwork, murals that can compete with the best cinematography that Breaking Bad treated us to and a genuine feeling of sunshine and heat on a cold rainy day.
The menu is Mexican on acid.
That’ll be Beau then.
What Beau and the rest of the team understand is getting a place to feel right; then, writing a menu that makes you hungry. Very hungry. Beer food for the Y generation, that smacks your arse on the way back down the stairs.
Gordo's Favourite Crispy Beef Taco
Buffalo Chicken Blasts. (£3.50), are five breast strips, ‘rinsed’ in either tangy hot buffalo or, as Gordo had them, Hawaiian BBQ, with blue cheese dip and celery sticks. The chicken moist, the coating glossy and sweet, and a blue cheese dip not raped with e-numbers.
Mac and Cheese made with Brooklyn beer, three cheeses, mustard and crispy grilled cheese BBQ tortilla crumb crust and a side of tortilla chips (£6.50) was a barn-stopper, with flavour wielded with a purple-velvet wrapped sledge hammer. Gordo, of course, insisted on extra crab and bacon on top of his, for an extra two English.
‘Street Tacos’ are delivered on traditional soft wheat flour tortillas; Dirty Chicken and its bro’ Crispy Beef were an exercise in delivering flavours that liked each other and are simply the best in the North West. The crispy beef topped the lot with brilliant balancing of texture and cheeky heat. Nothing and no-where can beat these babies. Kim Jung Ill will be struggling even with his nuclear tests. Priced to sell at £6.50.
Mac And Cheese With Crab And Bacon
Lettuce Cups, (£3.50), if they are represented faithfully, probably arrived with the railway into San Diego by way of the Chinese labour used to build it a couple of hundred years ago. Sweet and sour, crunchy and soft, chicken, teriyaki-style saucing with pineapple, mango and peanuts and crunchy iceberg lettuce is just, well, horny.
Jail Break Beef Chilli (£7.50) was made with beef brisket, mixed textures, chorizo keeping score along with cheese, sour cream and bacon. A big grown-up bowl full of it that, for Gordo, was judged brilliantly with heat. He can taste it (in a good way) three days later.
Pudding was Sweet Dreams; OC cheese cake fantasy Heavenly Bandito Brownie (£7.50). Enough for four people this, or Gordo. Have a look at the picture; its sodding filthy is all that can be said. Filthy dirty chocolate, vanilla ice cream, chocolate sauce (hot) and weird stuff on a stick. Well named, especially the Heavenly bit. Surprisingly light it also needs to be said.
You can probably tell that Fatty is an instant convert. So is Hungry Hoss. When Gordo walked in he had ordered three lots of Tacos. As well as this. Sit down before you read it.
‘Tapout Burrito; crispy beef, BBQ pulled Pork, shredded beer can chicken in this MAN vs BURRITO challenge, with skin on potato fries, cheese, spicy rice, grilled onions & salad lubed with secret taco sauce with guac…’ It’s THIRTY QUID and bloody massive. Mental. At least a porn star fourteen inches and as thick as a tyre. Hoss ate the bloody lot. (See main picture)
Gordo bows down to him.
Dos Equis beer was drunk by Gordo and his pal Shagger who came along to make sure he didn’t fall down the stairs, which had no rail on them when they were there. Health and Safety will be moaning.
Service had the hallmarks of being organised by Beau’s fit Missus who is brilliant at process. This is going to be a sell out folks, expect queues.
You can follow Gordo on Twitter @GordoManchester
ALL SCORED CONFIDENTIAL REVIEWS ARE IMPARTIAL AND PAID FOR BY THE MAGAZINE.
Luck, Lust, Liquor & Burn 100 – 102 High Street, City, M4 1HP. 0161 832 8644.
Rating: 16/20 (Remember venues are rated against the best examples of their kind so check out the box below)
Food: 8/10 (Crispy Beef Taco 9, Dirty Chicken Taco 7.5, Buffalo Chicken 10, Lettuce Cups 7, Mac & Cheese 7.5, Jailbreak Chilli 8, Cheesecake 7.5)
Service: 4/5
Ambience: 4/5
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taco heaven
Gordo, you really do reviews! Funny tho' I don't get some of your stuff being Yankee an' all. Next time in Barbados...
Sounds very interesting, but sorry, mate, you nearly lost me several times in the opening, rambling, paragraphs... stop trying to be so clever. Delete all the crap above the first three photos and you'll be about right. :o)
Thanks for that Mike. Can you direct me to your published matter so I can learn to be better from you?
Not read Gordo before have you Mike? he's worse than AA Gill. But endearing.
Lost me too. Far too long.
Good point GORDO, of course you have to be published to be able to read. Can you direct us to your successful restaurant that you use as your yardstick for criticising others on this blog?
Yeah Gordo - perhaps try giving these to someone with writing ability? Not that I can blame you for getting in on all the freebies though (you fat twat!)
Isn't it Luck,Lust, Liquor and Burn?
LOVE ??
wot you on about?
So, what on earth is Love, Lust Liquor and Burn?
Secondly, it has people in it that can be in Love,
Oops.
The unanswered question is... are they open every evening?
Or only towards the end of the week like AFB?
Hey!
We're open every day from 12 for lunch, except for Monday when we're not open at all.
LLLB x
@liquorandburn
barrio@lucklustliquorburn.com
any menus Gordo? the website is under construction
Hey!
We're just having our website built by the guys at redstar creative, but in the meantime there's a copy of our menu here: www.bacononthebeech.com/…/-burn-manchester.html…
or here: www.hungryhoss.com/…/iquor-burn-manchester.html…
Or pop in and grab one from us if you're in the area!
LLLB x
@liquorandburn
barrio@lucklustliquorburn.com
thank you!
Beau, answer please
Are the cocktails a return to Rodeo, the previous incarnation of Keko??? I'll be a very very happy man if so..........
same people...
Minus Ian Morgan, or so I thought. Thanks for the insight though on the food. Reasonable queues permitting it seems well worth a visit!
Minus One of the founders (IM), or so I thought. Appreciate the insight on food though. Worth a look reasonable waiting time permitting.........
it's okay Gordo, found them on Hoss's site. Menu looks awesome!!!
Says in review called Love, Lust Liquor and Burn.
It is open all day today.
Says on the front of the restaurant Luck, Lust, Liquor and Burn.
Isn't everyone an expert in food? It takes 10,000 hours to become an expert. If we spend on average an hour a day eating, anyone over 27 and a half is a food expert. Bit of a cheap swipe and pot, kettle, black moment.
I've seen the kind of stuff people put in their trolley at the supermarket- many people over 27 1/2 are not food experts.
Well, to be fair, everyone's opinion is welcome. Gordo did his Master Butchers' ticket, worked as a KP in kitchens at night in his teens for pocket money, published cook books when in his twenties, spent seven years in France writing about food and drink, and the last nine years again writing on food and drink. When his arm works, he cooks in competitions, is one of the cheese judges at the Nantwich festival, has over 6000 twitter followers and 149,000 email followers. Oh, and he is a big fat bastard.
What/Who you swiping at Gordo?
Food looks amazing - looking forward to trying it.
Went the other day and really liked it although the tacos are a bit expensive seeing as the same ones in Wahaca (London) and Lucha Libre (Liverpool) cost less than £4, although bet those licence plates cost a bit.
Man versus food. NHS loses.
Tax payer and NHS wins early deaths save on expensive long term elderly care and state pension payouts.
BRING IT ON!!
Yeah, give them seconds. Fill your arteries kids!
this was so hard to read it gave me a headache.
oh dear
:-)
Sounds good thia
this
get to lucha libre in the pool..
different style of cuisine and, dare i say, a bit bland
Not really different Anon 2. In fact there's many identical items on both menus. I love Lucha Libre and would love a branch of that or Wahaca in Manchester.
Visited today. They have good lunch offer.
QUOTE: "GORDOThis Morning at 11:46 AM.
Thanks for that Mike. Can you direct me to your published matter so I can learn to be better from you?"
Would be my pleasure, but it may not be complex enough for you to waste your mighty intellect on... I fear I have a tendency to get to the point rather closer to the start of my scribblings. :-)
Good one Mike.
I visited this evening, the Chicken Blasts are delicious, and yes, accompanied by probably the nicest Blue Cheese dip around.
Jailbreak Beef Chilli - really mellow, and filling (when accompanied by a side of Mac & Cheese). I confess I was beaten. Given that two guys on a table close to mine polished off a Tapout Burrito - each - I was left feeling decidedly lightweight.
Best Tex-Mex I'v tried for many a long year.
Gordo is right - there will be queues.
Just a question, but is the massive burrito a proper man v food challenge? Seems a bit cheeky to make a 30 quid challenge then not offer it for free if you can eat it all in under 60 minutes, or such like. Especially if you are so blatantly marketig it as a classic american style pig out eating challenge
...and GOD loves a trier.
Is this the same Hungry Hoss that embarrassingly slated Almost Famous in his blog?
As much as I disagreed with Hoss' assessment of AF in his blog, LLLB is a completely different place so why not have a different opinion.
It's not though is it? They both did the same food until AF burnt down now LLLB does the AF burger menu.
Anon - why would it be embarrassing if he slated Almost Famous?? he's a food critic/blogger, that's his job and he isn't reviewing Luck, lust etc he is accompanying Gordo.
The 'innuendo' and just plain bollocks phrases used whenever ANYONE describes this place and Almost Famous is enough to bring sick to the back of your throat.
"smacks your arse on the way back down"
"not raped with e-numbers."
"a purple-velvet wrapped sledge hammer"
"Dirty Chicken"
"crunchy iceberg lettuce is just, well, horny"
"its sodding filthy is all that can be said. Filthy dirty chocolate,"
"At least a porn star fourteen inches and as thick as a tyre"
It is so 'tryhard' it is genuinely painful. I can't believe anyone buys into this.
critics just laping up the PR and getting on the band waggon
Chill out and have some fun. These places can be annoying, but they are getting younger people into eating out. I was fed up with being the youngest person in virtually all the restaurants in Manchester - and I was getting on for 30 so not young at all! Yes this 'dude food' thing is an import from that there scary London place, who nicked it from New York- but at least it's not BORING which frankly 90% of Manc restaurants are... They add a bit of light in a generally dire scene: read Living Ventures, Grill on the zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz and other snooze fests
Agree with Anon 2 about blander than bland Living Ventures. But does the alternative really have to be wanky hipster fashionable 'dirty' food joints?
And what's wrong with being the youngest person in a restaurant? Presumably your own company is your own age? What are you planning on doing; socialising/procreating with the other diners?
Avoid any eating establishment remotely 'fashionable' is my advice.
Oscar Wilde was right: Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to alter it every six months.
Young people aren't eating out because many of them are unemployed (proportionally more than the population as a whole) or on very low wages.
Funny they still have enough money to get legless...
Solve binge drinking with binge eating - just go for a jog the next day!
This place could be providing a public service and save the NHS a packet.
Not entirely sure what a hipster is, but I do know I have never been threatened, punched, mugged, burgled or intimidated by one... Who knows maybe they are just harmless youngsters having fun!
I have never understood why being young and fashionable is considered evil by so many people? May I hazard a guess at jealousy...
Chill out mate, you never read a review before? haha
Sweet Jesus that was hard to read and could have been summed up in a sentence. Restaurant sounds great, ill never read another review on here again though.
Just self indulgence. If he was half as good as he thought he was legitimatemedia outlets would actually pay for his reviewing services, rather than him having to set up a website so he can occasionally write his own nonsense.
Mancon is the only 'legitimate' media left in the North West, and looking at what they are charging for advertising, Gordo is being paid handsomely! What media does anonymous above think is better than Confidential for reviewing food and drink? point me to it! Oh, and genuinely impartial? Ive known Gordo for eight years and he is the only critic who isnt on the Lig. He pays for everything he has and is a brilliant tipper.
The Guardian...The Observer. My point wasn't confined to only North West media. If he is so talented, it is fair to compare him to national media. Also what they charge for advertising and what they get are another not necessarily the same.
Anonymous. Now, lets see. The Guardian sells about 215,000 copies around the UK. 10% of that in the Northwest. Therefore 21,500 copies sold. Somewhere around 20% will read the food and drink pages. so 4,300 will have the opportunity to read whoever the hell is the foodwriter there. Lets not forget that your London centric paper will write about the south and London 80% of the time to keep the overheads down. We get a North West review one week in five; not even that. With this lot, we get two a week in the North West and by one measurement, the weekly food email, is asked for by 79,000 people twice a week. Gordo, Schofield et al DWARF the Guardian, Times, Independent FT and Telegraph. The question is, is it fare to compare the dying National Media to Gordo? In my opinion Gordo is far more entertaining. And, as my partner pointed out, the nationals are paying peanuts to their food writers telling them they are lucky to be building their brand for that hoped-for TV slot and book. Don't be so snotty about this web mag, its good fun and informative and i get good ROI from my ad spend.
Vested interest
Vested interest indeed. He seems to have also conveniently forgotten the internet and smart phone readership of the guardian et al - in its first 6 months 400,000 downloaded the guardian app. How many have donwloaded the ManCon app?
Are the anons above working at The Grauniad, wondering about redundancies by any chance? Vested interests indeed.
I think people sre being a bit harsh on Gordo
Thanks for that bit of support anon. The other anons are just trainee trolls, wankers who hide behind keyboards. My mission is to inform, educate and irritate, in no particular order. I love them having a go and giving them the platform to do so.
I agree the review and the place are a laugh. A surprising amount of uptight people on ManCon...
Went to LLLB last night and was told there was a 2hr wait for food, this was after being told there was no need to book earlier on in the day. Shame really, as we were really looking forward to it. Went Solita insteaed, burgers were fantastic! Will give LLLB another try in the coming weeks.
Burning the first three paragraphs would improve this review tenfold.
All a bunch of moaning bastards! cheer up, it might never happen!
One thing I noticed at LLLB was that the beer (Pacifico) was a different price on the menu to that on the bill. It's only 20 or so pence more but all those 20 pences add up.
Nice to see the man con readers called wankers by the reviewer. Terrible article.
Honestly Anon lose the anger. It's an opinionated food review is all. Good place LLLB and a good boost for the Northern Quarter.
Oi, Gordito - I've never come across a homosexual called Peter who insists on being called "Petey". We're all very butch these days, treacle.
Good review though - looks delicious
Just posted that rant without noticing a double entendre that would make Kenneth Williams blush. Clearly, not all that butch...
At last! This the food we have be waiting for! Everything works, location, decor, service and best of all the amazing food.....
I actually got a bit of a headache reading that. Despite the nonsensical jibberish and waffle, I think it says the food is good.
Are all the miserable Anons the same guy? My suggestion for a happier life would be to just try and enjoy things for what they are. If, after trying, you don't like it, then just shrug your shoulders and move on, but keep smiling.
Like all the reviews, I thought it was great.
Its Very Expensive....overpriced big time. Anyone who has been to 'The Bird' in Berlin know that they can do this on a much cheaper scale...soon the sheep will be lining up outside the place only too willing to fleece themselves, for the sake of something you can make at home much cheaper.
Sheep fleecing themselves. Love it!
anyone been to R House yet? is it still alive?
What the fuck has R freaking House got to do with this review?
i want mancon to do a review of our house
Oh my god why, I have just had a look on-line and it looks so dated and naff in every way it's utterly mind boggling! It really looks like a rubbish 90s place in the Village. I feel really bad for people who sink money into places when they don't have a clue! This looks like a gay accountant has blown his nest egg on this investment. Makes me sad...
Was at LLLB on Wednesday evening with my teenage kids. They loved it and so did I. They reckon the burgers are better here than upstairs at AFB. Great food and lovely staff. What more do you need when dining out? I will be going back. Great review Gordo.
Went to LLLB for breakfast today. Wont go again. The staff were so busy chatting that they did not even notice that they had customers. Food was ok but no customer service what so ever. Really need to train the staff if they want people to return. There are plenty of places to eat in Manchester with good service. I would have ordered more coffee but the staff did not seem to want customers. There were only 4 other customers, so not busy and yet no service. Even a smile from staff when you arrive would make a difference.
Had some good food there last night - vegetarian burrito (which was huge) and pint of shrimp and squid (like a posh scampi). Good little gaff.
Had a shocker of meal here the other week. The chili was inedible and pork roll was far too sweet. I have been a few times before found it really great, I do hope they are not letting the standards slip. The staff as always were brilliant though.