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Peter Kay Night

Published on February 8th 2006.

Have you watched your Peter Kay DVDs too many times or do you know the words to the ‘My Mum wants a Bungalow’ tour inside out and back to front?


Need convincing?...
Click here for the Genius of Peter KayClick here for Peter Kay's Questions
Click here for Peter Kay's Universal Truths

Well, Francis House Children's Hospice in association with Excel Publishing are going to be pumping more of the same laughing gas into you by hosting a star studded night with Kay as the star billing.

The night is to raise money for Francis House and promises to be a spectacular one.

The evening will be hosted by Dianne Oxberry at Chester Racecourse on Friday 2nd June. Your night will start with a Champagne reception followed by a gourmet feast prepared by Heathcotes – no garlic bread in sight - plus a live act by Peter Kay followed by an auction hosted by no other than Charlie Ross from BBC’s Flog It and another live performance, this time by Salford’s very own Russell Watson.

Tables seat ten people (an ideal opportunity to wine and dine corporate clients) and are being sold at the following prices...

Platinum - £1500
Gold - £1250
Silver- £1000

There are also plenty sponsorship opportunities available for any companies interested.

Be warned these tables will be sold quicker than hotcakes, especially seeing that there is no sign of Peter Kay touring in the near future, so get those fingers typing and fill in the form below to register your interest in the event, and someone will be in touch to iron out the finer details.

Peter Kay Night
2 June, 2006
Chester Racecourse

Georgina Hague
Email Me Now!


The Genius of Peter Kay...

  • I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with 'Guess' on it. I said, Thyroid problem?
  • When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bike. Then I realised that The Lord doesn't work that way, so I stole one and asked him to forgive me.
  • I've often wanted to drown my troubles, but I can't get my wife to go swimming.
  • I was doing some decorating, so I got out my step-ladder. I don't get on with my real ladder.
  • Well I was bullied at school, called all kinds of different names. But one day I turned to my bullies and said - 'Sticks and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me', and it worked! From there on it was sticks and stones all the way.
  • My Dad used to say 'always fight fire with fire', which is probably why he got thrown out of the fire brigade.
  • Sex is like a game of bridge: If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.
  • I saw six men kicking and punching the mother-in-law. My neighbour said 'Are you going to help?' I said 'No, Six should be enough.'
  • If we aren't supposed to eat animals, then why are they made out of meat?
  • I think animal testing is a terrible idea; they get all nervous and give the wrong answers.
  • You know that look women get when they want sex? Me neither.

Now, click here to register your interest.

Peter Kay's Questions....
  • If a person owns a piece of land do they own it all the way down to the core of the earth
  • Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed?
  • Why is it called Alcoholics Anonymous when the first thing you do is stand up and say, 'My name is Bob, and I am an alcoholic'?
  • Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
  • Why does mineral water that 'has trickled through mountains for centuries' have a 'use by' date?
  • Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp no one would eat?
  • Is French kissing in France just called kissing?
  • Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, 'I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here and drink whatever comes out'?
  • What do people in China call their good plates?
  • Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom?
  • Why is a person that handles your money called a 'Broker'?
  • If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?
  • Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out of the window?

Now, click here to register your interest.

Peter Kay's Universal Truths

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