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There are three things that give a man purpose in life: football, beer and corsets. But while the former two are programmed into their genetic makeup, the latter, for most men is still to be mastered.
Faced with a woman’s heaving bosom strapped tightly into a corset, even the most arrogant and sexually proficient of males is reduced to a slobbering imbecile. This is exactly what the Manchester Confidential girls discovered when they rocked up to the North West Comedy Awards at the Midland Hotel in their glorious steel boned corsets created by CoCu Boutique in Barton Arcade.
Ladettes are instantly transformed to ladies with one yank of a cord. Shoulders are pushed back, ironing board postures emerge, boobs are enhanced, inches are added to height and waists disappear without the need for ghastly suck in knickers (always a huge disappointment for a bloke).
You can’t actually breathe or eat. But if you look fabulous dahlings, fainting is a minor inconvenience.
This is quite possibly the closest experience you’ll have to trying on wedding dresses, minus the sweaty palms and bleating mother. The corset and skirt ensembles are completely unique and designed by Cocu, so can be adjusted or the design altered if need be. There’s a range of different skirts from a flirty fifties A-line with taffeta underneath to a super-sophisticated fishtail. Plus Slim and Joanne excel at welcoming you into the wonderful world of corsets.
Us girlies really did glam it up wearing the full shebang for the big event, but you don’t necessarily have to strut your stuff in satin. Cocu can create an art form out of various materials. We’ve seen some incredibly stylish tweed ones, which would look divine with jeans.
Purchasing a corset is a style investment.It’s a timeless classic. Most trends come in and out of fashion more than Noel Edmunds but a corset stands the test of time.
We love them and we think tight-arse Gordo should get his wallet out and buy them for us as a reward for making him look good.
A big thank you to CoCu for lending us the outfits and making us look movie star material. Mwah…
Vanessa Lees
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