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BREAKING NEWS: Special undies for left-handed men

Are you one of Britain's estimated 3 million left-handed men? This breakthrough could save you three seconds toilet time...

Published on September 25th 2009.

BREAKING NEWS: Special undies for left-handed men

Underpants, designed especially for left-handed men, are to go on sale at Debenhams.

Left-handed men have to reach much further into their pants, performing a Z-shaped manoeuvre through two 180 degree angles before achieving the result that right handed men perform with ease.

For the first time, the trunks by Hom, priced at £22, will have an opening slit made horizontally at the top of the gusset instead of the right – breaking a tradition which has lasted for almost 75 years.

Underpant experts say the new design will save left-handed men up to three, often vital, seconds when visiting the loo. That's 5.7 days per lifetime (based on a man going to the toilet six times a day for 75 years). And ladies, don't think this doesn't affect you. Those extra seconds could be put to good use putting the seat down after his left-handed experience.

In addition, left-handed men complain that fumbling around to find the right handed opening is often a source of embarrassment.

Rob Faucherand, Head of Men’s Accessories Buying for Debenhams said: “In our view this is a vital step toward equality for left-handed men. We see no reason why an accident of birth should dictate the type of underpants you can wear for the rest of your life.”

Almost 10 per cent of the male population – over three million men – are believed to be left-handed. Yet men’s pants have traditionally had a right handed opening from the time they were invented in 1935.

As a result, left-handed men have to reach much further into their pants, performing a Z-shaped manoeuvre through two 180 degree angles before achieving the result that right handed men perform with ease.

Previously, boxer shorts, with an adaptable, ambidextrous opening in the middle, have been the underpants of choice for left-handed men. However, this has deprived them of the firmer support offered by trunks which are the garment of choice for active, sporty men.

Faucherand added: “Our new pants means that, for the very first time, all left-handed men can finally go to the loo as quickly and efficiently as their right handed colleagues. Switching the opening from vertical to horizontal may sound like a small step, but it’s the major breakthrough that many have been waiting for.”

The new pants (Hom H1 Original Maxi Trunk and Hom Ego HO1 Hipster Trunk) are available online at Debenhams now.

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Lord StreetSeptember 25th 2009.

Apparently the sort of people who shop in Debenhams cannot eat with a knife and fork, according to Debenhams’ own figures on their sales of knives. What such people get up to with their hands in their thunderbags I dread to think. I think it is best if we just avert our eyes and hope they go away.

GollumSeptember 25th 2009.

Hadn't it occured to the manufacturers that guys can just pull em down at the front instead? What a waste of time. Three seconds extra? Enough time for a w*nk then!?

sarahSeptember 25th 2009.

This is the most bizzare article ive ever read on Man Con!! men getting their c**ks out haha brilliant

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