City news in 250 words: Thursday 4 November

PENNY FOR THE ROONEY: A 49ft Wayne Rooney effigy with Shrek-style ears will be burnt at a bonfire event in Kent this Friday. The dummy, which is clutching a five-year contract and cash, will be the centrepiece at Edenbridge Bonfire Society's parade and display. It will go up in flames in front of 15,000 people.

ALI G ROBBER IN FLIXTON BOOKIES: Police have released stills of CCTV footage after the William Hill branch on Woodsend Circle was targeted by a man wearing an Ali G facemask and two others last Saturday. The offenders held a knife to a woman's throat before stealing cash and running out of the store. Nobody was injured. Anyone with any information should call police on 0161 856 7679.

WE HAVE THE WORST TRAFFIC IN THE UK. Well, some of the worst. A nationwide study by traffic management company INRIX found that Manchester commuters spend, on average, 72 hours stuck in traffic every year. The report analysed the movement of motorway traffic in Britain's 25 largest metropolitan areas. The top ten most congested roads in Greater Manchester are as follows:

1. M67 - Mottram in Longdendale junction (A57)

2. Princess Parkway A5103 / Mancunian Way

3. M61 - Jct 3 Kearsley

4. M60 - Jct 14 Swinton

5. M67 - M60 Denton interchange

6. M60 - Jct 10 Trafford Centre

7. M56 - Jct 2 Sharston

8. M61 - Jct 2 Walkden

9. M61 - Jct 1, M60 Wardley Interchange

10. M60 - Jct 11 Barton

Out of the window weather forecast: The clouds are like big grey water bombs ready to splatter on your head. You can’t run, you can’t hide, so prepare to get drenched.