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<b>Wednesday 30 September:</b> Council talks about sex, headteacher bans filthy mouths plus Brown and Marr team up

Published on September 30th 2009.

THE COUNCIL HAS PUBLISHED AN ILLUSTRATED SEX GUIDE for over 50s. Chapters including 'Let's talk about sex' and 'Practice and being prepared', feature in the 47-page Guide to Good Sexual Health for the Over 50s, launched by the city's health bosses tomorrow. Five-thousand copies of the book have been produced at a total cost of £8,000 to Manchester City Council and NHS Manchester.

IMPERIAL WAR MUSEUM NORTH is one of three winning local tourist spots to scoop an award at the Northwest Tourism Awards. The Lowry Hotel and Wigan Tourist Information Centre also impressed the judges at the ceremony, held at Blackpool Tower on Monday. The businesses, described as “the best of the best”, will now go on to represent the region in next year’s national awards.

BROWN AND MARR ARE TO TEAM UP to write and record an album. The Stone Roses’ frontman and The Smiths’ guitarist will join forces to form a supergroup to write the soundtrack for a friend's TV drama. The pair, who live near one another in Lymm, are hoping to rope Happy Mondays’ bassist Paul Ryder into the project. “We're going to get together and do the soundtrack for these dramas. We'd have to bring a drummer or a bass player in”, Brown said.

A HEADTEACHER HAS ORDERED PARENTS to stop swearing while on school premises or face being banned. Martin Henderson, head of Westmorland Primary in Brinnington, Stockport, has written to all pupils’ parents threatening legal action after an increase in foul language.

This ‘N’ That: If winning wasn't important they wouldn't have scoreboards

Taken from the free calendar available at This 'n' That, Soap Street, Northern Quarter. Wisdom rating: 4/10

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15 comments so far, continue the conversation, write a comment.

Bride of DawkinsSeptember 30th 2009.

In which case, can I lodge a complaint against street preachers? It offends me.

GordoSeptember 30th 2009.

Mind you, another good thing about being over fifty is that you can last an awful lot longer, I can keep going for well over two minutes these days.

over 60September 30th 2009.

Thought clitoris allsorts were made by Bassets

over 60September 30th 2009.

Gordo, you sure about the 2 minutes, I heard that was porkies.

GordoSeptember 30th 2009.

Glad of any tips, never to late to learn. I have learnt recently that a clitoris isn't in a lady's armpit. Which answers an awful lot of questions...

AnonymousSeptember 30th 2009.

I was arrested for it when I was much younger. The charge goes something like 'saying or doing something that may cause offence to those around you'.

GordoSeptember 30th 2009.

AND you know what the lavatory plunger is really for.

OSeptember 30th 2009.

good move by the head teacher. Swearing when dropping kids off at school? What's wrong with people? I bet it's the same clampets who take their kids to school dressed in their pyjamas. I swear I saw one horror the other day, it was raining so she was wearing boots and a jacket and in between... pyjama bottoms. Where's the logic in that? Moron. If I were the headmaster I'd say parents must not swear at the school and must be wearing outdoor clothing when dropping kids off. Anyone not adhering to the rules, your kids get an hour detention. Imagine getting DT because your mum dropped you off in the same pants she slept in the night before. Gutted.

JinkiesSeptember 30th 2009.

Can you bring about legal action for swearing in public? Ho hum, I bet the parents in Brinni don't give a flying ****

Not furiousSeptember 30th 2009.

Furious - if it was the case that people in their 50s knew about sexual health, then why is it that the biggest increase in STIs is within that age group? eight grand is very little when you think about how much it costs to treat an STI, particularly the bigger ones. If one person changes their sexual behaviour as a result of it and avoids contracting, say, HIV, the cost will have been returned dozens of times over.

over 60September 30th 2009.

Bottle of Cristal, chaffeur driven Bentley outside, works most times!. Hope the hand book also has a reminder to change hands

CasSeptember 30th 2009.

Just stop it.

Furious!September 30th 2009.

What a complete waste of money - £8k on a sexual guide for the over 50's? Like anyone gets to their 50's and doesn't know how to have sex? Or use a condom? or have pleasure? have the council gone mad? There are far more important things that the council should be spending money on like ridding streets of this great city of yob culture, drug pushers and users and alcoholics.

CasSeptember 30th 2009.

What are the older generation up to! Put eachother down tigers.

Gaylord FockerSeptember 30th 2009.

What a luddite! £8k to improve the happiness and wellbeing of loads of folk? Bargain!

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