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<b>Thursday 10 April:</b> Bishop leads Todd tributes, Marks & Spencer expand and Mark E Smith upsets the RSPCA

Published on April 10th 2008.

THE BISHOP of Manchester will lead tributes at Manchester Chief Constable Thanksgiving service on Friday. The special service will praise Michael Todd for his tireless work in the community. Rt Revd Nigel McCulloch said: “Michael was committed to helping the wounded in society and protecting the innocent who suffer from violence.” The service will feature readings, hymns and tributes.

MARKS & SPENCER is looking for more space in or around Manchester city centre. According to reports, the retailer which has four sites in Manchester and one on Salford Quays, may also transfer some of it's London staff to Manchester. In a statement regarding the reports, Marks & Spencer said: “We are constantly looking to ensure that our sites best suit our needs.”

ROCK STAR Mark E Smith, front man of the band The Fall, is under investigation by the RSPCA after saying in an interview that he kills squirrels. The Salford born singer reportedly said: “Squirrels mean nothing to me. I killed a couple last weekend actually. They were eating my garden fence.” The RSPCA is concerned that he may have been referring to endangered red squirrels which are protected by the law.

MANCHESTER UNITED will join Liverpool and Chelsea in the Champions League semi-finals following their 3-0 aggregate win over Roma last night. The Reds will play Barcelona in the next stage. Sir Alex Ferguson told MUTV: “We have the opportunity now to achieve something really special. We want to go to Barcelona and show we’re a good team.”

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GrandwazooApril 10th 2008.

Just as we always suspected - Mark E Smith - is a squirrel murderer

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