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<b>Thursday 1 October:</b> Uni cancer deaths coincidence, pitch invader banned and Noah and the Whale robbed in Manchester

Published on October 1st 2009.

THE CANCER DEATHS AT A MANCHESTER UNIVERSITY building have been found to be a “coincidence”. The deaths of six scientists were thought to have been caused by left over radioactive materials from the atomic structure scientists built in the building at the beginning of the 20th century. An inquiry by Professor David Coggon found “no atomic link” between the deaths.

THE PITCH INVADER who clashed with Manchester City’s Craig Bellamy during the derby has been banned from all matched for three years. Bricklayer Jake Clarke, 21, from Chorley, admitted sprinting on to the pitch – “to celebrate with the players” - during Manchester United's 4-3 win over City Along with the ban, Trafford Magistrates fined Clarke £305.

GREATER MANCHESTER’S POLICE CHIEF has appealed to the government to stop making targets a priority and let his officers get on with the job. GMP chief constable Peter Fahy said, "Decisions are made elsewhere which affect us which aren't necessarily appropriate to the local need” and officers should tackle issues decided by local people.

NOAH AND THE WHALE have had the UK tour disrupted after having all their equipment stolen from a car park in Manchester. The gear - including vintage guitars, brass instruments and the drum kit - were taken from a car park near the Club Academy venue on Tuesday night. Lead singer Charlie Fink said, “It’s hard to explain the relationship you have with a guitar”, but has vowed the band will carry on with the tour by using borrowed instruments.

This ‘N’ That: Those who agree with us may not be right, but we admire their astuteness

Taken from the free calendar available at This 'n' That, Soap Street, Northern Quarter. Wisdom rating: 3/10

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5 comments so far, continue the conversation, write a comment.

Oh really?October 1st 2009.

Requirements from high up have actually resulted in lowering of standards. That's new... that's Nu Laboh.

Hieronymous BiffOctober 1st 2009.

Somebody's nicked their whale as well.

Doughnut Shop OwnerOctober 1st 2009.

The police like to claim that all their failures are due to 'targets'.In many reported cases the crime is already solved for them, these cases could be cleared up quickly and clear targets.They *prefer* to bumble along on hopeless cases that require no work and claim the overtime.Or sit around filling out paper work.Its nothing to do with government targets, its simply lazy police officers.

east lancsOctober 1st 2009.

Funny, I know a few coppers, they work bloody hard and it's obvious they care about what they do. Guess they're the minority huh?!

annoyedOctober 1st 2009.

GMP could do with asking their officers to spend a little more time and detail on their reports in order that the right support be given to victims of crime and consequently catch the perpetrators.I can tell you from 1st hand experince the reporting is a nonsense and most coppers are just offering one line descriptons of a crime leaving others to pick up the pieces. Worry about the targets when you are doing the basics GMP...

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